So It Begins

We have struggled, my wife and I, for a number of years in our relationship because of different preferences when it comes to the bedroom. She loves sex of the vanilla sort. I love BDSM and kink. We have tried over the years to find some place in between, or alternating between our sexual preferences. None of them were particularly successful.

Overall, we have a wonderful relationship. We have never had an argument in earnest, have never raised our voices at each other, and we are generally very good at communicating with each other. That being said, having done a little reading and a little research, we decided to attempt Femdom/female-led (or a variation of it).

My wife does not particularly enjoy dominating me; she does not particularly enjoy BDSM of any variety. She actively dislikes anything more 'dirty'. She does have a small sadistic streak, but it is not at all sexual in nature for her. However, we hope that the benefits to her of such an arrangement will outweigh her distaste.

For my part, I have loved and fantasized about BDSM for as long as I have thought about women and sex. While I do enjoy vanilla sex, when I begin getting really aroused, I generally begin craving kink. I would not in general call myself a thrill-seeker; I consider myself fairly conservative. However, I love diversity (especially of the kinky variety) in the bedroom. No, I am not interested in bringing anyone else into the bedroom. I do have a number of hard limits. There are many things that I consider morally wrong. But between my wife and myself? I like to be surprised. I like to be restrained, dominated, tormented, and humiliated. I like diversity. 

We decided, for this attempt, that there would be one key: my wife owns and controls my sexuality, and anything directly to it. From there, she may as she chooses expand her control as far as she likes. She has no obligation to me; if she wants vanilla sex five times a week, it is my responsibility to provide; certainly, if she were to choose to do so, there would be the distinct advantage that I would not get aroused enough to truly crave BDSM. As my submissiveness is often directly proportional to my arousal, this would result in a much more equal relationship (with the exception of sexually).

However, my wife decided in general to start with the opposite; my orgasms will be infrequent at best, and she elected to exert control over a good deal more than just my sexuality. All of this...was decided while I was away on a month-long business trip, during which I was permitted no sexual release. By the time I arrived home late yesterday evening, I was extremely horny, and feeling more submissive than I ever have prior.

She reviewed the 'Ownership Manual' I wrote, which included rules, rituals, rewards, punishments, and instructions and information on a variety of subjects. She gave the rough draft her approval, and so we begin.